Tuesday, March 07, 2006

To Blog or Not To Blog?

What am I doing this for anyway? Who am I writing this for? These are the real questions if I want to answer the above question.

I thought a few people might read my blog. A few have, but not often, and perhaps my poetry has lost them to me afterall. I've wallowed in some self-pity over this fact: Why is it other blogs within my friend community are garnering more support then mine? Do people not like me? Not like my writing? Not like the things I talk about? Self-pity isn't pretty. I don't like living there.

When I started this blog, did I think other people would read it? Or was I writing for myself? If I'm writing for myself, for my own pleasure and entertainment, then it really doesn't matter if anyone else reads it, does it?

Problem is, you can tell yourself that, but it doesn't sit well. Kind of like telling your little child that their owie will feel better, it'll just take time - doesn't do much for the great pain they feel right then and there. Uh, oh, here comes the Self-Pity Train again!

So, my choices are: Stop writing because no one is reading. Keep writing and hope one day people will start reading. Keep writing and use it as an exercise to keep my brain thinking, creating, my fingers typing, my mind practiced at putting words to print.

I'll take Door Number Three, please Bob.

I just hope I can live with whatever I get.