Music Monday ~ Pop Muzik

My very first album--a rockin' 45--was Pop Muzik by M. I have strong memories of that song for no good reason. I remember being so mad at my mom that when she stood outside in our front yard talking to neighbors I turned the music up SCREAMIN' loud, threw open the window and sang in my loudest and most annoying voice. Needless to say, I got the attention I was seeking, but perhaps not in the way I had hoped. I think I was about ten years old. And I was a brat.

But Pop Muzik remained a favorite of mine and still does to this day. It still makes me smile. So here's a little tribute to all the other forty-somethings out there who remember bouncing and bobbing to M back in the day.

Most of you won't be wondering where I've been for the past week, because most of you will have been hanging out with me at the LDStorymakers conference. But if you weren't there, I'm so, so sorry. It was (in the immortal words of Rhino the Hamster) fully awesome! Best time I've had a writers' conference yet.

Nope, no awards for me this year, but that's okay. I didn't have any right to expect to win one as I did not submit my best work. I tossed it off and well, you get what you get and you don't throw a fit as my son's kindergarten teacher used to say.

Nevertheless, I came away feeling like a winner. I have some new insight into who I am as a writer and how I can improve my writing. I made lots of new friends and strengthened the friendships I already had.

In particular, I'd like to give a personal shout out to Jenn, Laura, Melinda, Kristi, James, Rob, Tristi, Deborah and Julie. . Jenn was my roommate and is now my BFF. And I'm not even joking--if she'll have me, I'll be her friend for life. She ROCKS. Everyone else went out of their way to say hi to me, to make me feel loved and I did--I felt so loved. It was an amazing experience of acceptance and validation (haha if any of you were in Julie's class and saw that video :D.) Thank you, all of you, so much.

Hey, if you feel like checking out my blog at LDS Writers Blogck, you'll get to read more of my wacky weirdness in today's post.

The Value of Friendship

Friendships mark our days from our earliest beginnings. But do we ever recognize their value in our lives?

My first friend was a girl named Nicole St. Pierre. Her family lived next door to mine in Bramalea, Ontario, Canada. In 1968, her mom was pregnant at the same time as mine--Nicole was born one day short of a month later than me. 

We grew up together, like sisters more than friends. Our mothers often dressed us the same--Nicole a dark haired princess and me, a fair little fairy. 

Nicole and I shared toys and dreams. We were the shining lights in each others' eyes and cherished our friendship like none other.

Until she moved away.

We tried to maintain our friendship, but we were still little kids--I think we might have been eight when her parents moved. A few years later Nicole moved back, and we rebuilt our friendship as best we could. We knew enough, then, that a friendship like ours was a rare and special thing.

But children are swept to and fro along with the whims of their parents, and so it was with Nicole and I. We managed to stay in touch for the most part, but never had the opportunity again to reconnect with the friendship of our childhood.

I've had a few friends since Nicole. It's interesting though that I see a pattern in my selection of friends--I seem to have but one real friend for each time of my life.

From birth to grade eight, it was Nicole. Then Laurie from grade eight to thirteen. In university, there was Peggy. In my grown-up life there is Sheri.

I have many more friends as an adult than I ever did as a child/young adult. I'm more capable, now, of having 'lighter' friends--not every friend has to know all my deep, dark secrets. But it's nice knowing that someone out there does. 

I haven't always valued the friendships in my life. I've been far too quick to lose touch, to not give the friendship the time and effort it deserves.

I'm writing this because I've recently realized that I am doing that again with Sheri. She is an true friend and so far she has always forgiven me of my lapses in being a good friend. She is the most amazing of friends and deserves better from me.

The value of friendship is something I want to truly appreciate. I don't want to grow old and discover I don't have any real friends left because I didn't treat the few friends I had with the love and respect they deserved. 

Each one of my closest friends, and all those who I am now blessed to call friend, are wonderful and amazing in their own way. They are all unique from one another and I am a better person and my life more rich for knowing them.

Thoughtful Thursday ~ I Love . . . Friends

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

This quote is perhaps my favorite of all time. It expresses, so simply, what I believe to be true about good friends, true friends. 

One time I heard a psychiatrist say that friends made online were not true friends. That people who made such friends were loners, afraid or incapable of making friends in the real world. 

Well, in my humble opinion, that is just hogwash.

I have a couple of online groups of friends.

There are the twin moms, some of whom I've been friends with since before I conceived my boys. We met in an IVF chat room, and went on to share the ups and downs of twin mommyhood in a twin mommy group. I've been friends with these women for close to nine years. I've met many of them in person. I've spoken to many on the phone. They have been there for me when I needed them in the way that really matters--they cared, they were there, they loved me.

There are the writer friends who support my nearest and dearest dreams. They've read my work and taken the time to help me grow as a writer. I've also met many of them in person, and started a critique group with some of them. 

And I do, too, have friends in real life, but, they don't negate the need that these other groups of friends fill for me. Real life is so demanding, hectic, harried. It's becoming increasingly difficult to maintain fulfilling friendships outside of the box on my desk. 

While I am deeply grateful for my real life friends--because laughter only really happens with them, the good belly-laugh kind of laugh and not the LOL kind of mental laughter that happens online--I am equally grateful for my online friends. 

My online friends have the ability to fit between the cracks of my life. They are 'there' for me any time of day, wherever I am. 

Personally, I think online friendships have helped me to be a better friend to my real life friends, have helped me to learn more about myself and to grow as a human being.

What do you think? Are online friendships just as important or meaningful as real life ones?